It is really important to ensure that you and everyone who connects with your newborn baby and infant, only ever communicate to them in an affirming and uplifting way, especially when it comes to bodily functions.
It is really important to ensure that you and everyone who connects with your newborn baby and infant, only ever communicate to them in an affirming and uplifting way, especially when it comes to bodily functions. This is so often overlooked by parents! It goes without saying that you want your child to love and respect every aspect of their body and its functions, to develop a strong and positive sense of self. So be aware that negative feedback in relation to poo, wee, vomit and gas can be very hurtful and damaging to you newborn baby and growing infant!
Your baby has just entered planet Earth and is seeking to embrace his/her new world, to feel like they belong within it and to gain a sense of self. They are learning to eat, drink, poo, wee, burp, throw-up and so much more. Just because they are in a new body that they are not able fully drive, because they cannot take themselves to the toilet and because they are not yet able to communicate verbally, DOES NOT mean that they are not fully aware of their environment and the people within it, or how they are accepted within that environment. To the contrary, they are super aware and absorbing all those messages verbal and non-verbal. This calls for our diligence!!
Can you imagine how damaging to your baby’s growing sense of self and self-worth it is to have those they depend upon and love (you), communicate in any of the following ways;
- Loudly expressing disgust at their poo or vomit?
“Oh my god, this is the hugest, smelliest crap I have ever seen!” (said with a look of horror and gagging reflex)
- Laugh out loud at their wind?
“Ha Ha did you hear that fart it was enormous?” (said with a look of shock, disbelief and entertainment)
- Make a spectacle of the baby while making any of the above comments?
Often parents say the above things to everyone within hearing range, even calling them over to have a look, and these other people then join in on the disgust or laughter repertoire!
Certainly this topic is one I was even conscious of with my first two children (who are now over 18 years old). In fact with these children I would actually physically be ill, every time I had to change a nappy!! However this time around with my new level of consciousness, I was acutely aware of how important our communication was around baby Sheannah. So before she was born, and diligently afterwards, I ensured that my husband and all her older brothers and sisters, even her childcare provider NEVER said anything negative in relation to her bodily functions.
So I /we would say things like…
“Honey you have done a poo – wow it is big poo – great work sweetheart!”
“What a healthy smell your poo has today bubby!”
“Oopsies – did you throw up sweetheart, it’s OK, let me clean that for you”
“Better out than in honey, good work”….
You get the message.
Food for thought isn’t it!
BE-LOVED AND BE FREE